This is the Nigerian Police as we interact on a day-to-day basis in my area:
Police: Hey boy ! identify your self?
Boy : well i’m Ibrahim and i am a UNILAG student
Police: Wey your I.D Card?
Boy: I be fresher naw dem neva give us
Police: Fresh wetin? #edondeymadt abi?
Boy: I just start
Police: So you don press laptop chop oyinbo money finish now u dey lie say na student you be.
Boy: Oga no be so ooo
Police: Wetin dey inside your bag?
Boy: Na my laptop and books
Police: Where you see money buy laptop and this your watch and chain sef?
Boy: Na my mama buy am o..
Police2: Shuo! no be this boy dem dey call arabmoney for shomolu?
Police; Arab what?!!? Good, you are under arrest !
Boy: why na? Police : for prohibition !
Boy : ‘WHAT’ ? Police ; you exhibit too much swaggz plus you be yahoo boy
Boy: Oga no be so naw
Police: c’mon sharrap and enter motor!
Boy : *laughs* oga I understand you,oya manage this N2000
Police: Add something jor..na my oga*DPO* dey motor so and him go take him share
Boy: O.C I swear na N500 extra i get here..i be your boy naw we dey area.
Police: You these yahoo boys ehn…una no dey like show for station come greet us
Boy: No vex my oga just manage this N2,500
Police : you get mouth !..I go dey expect you o!
Boy: No wahala Oga mi #OKbye
Morals: The Police is your friend. Just settle dem. 🙂